A discuss I’m glad we finally had.
The other day I had a interesting conversation with a friend of mine who asked do I miss my daughter, of course the obvious answer was hell yes. She immediately responded “why don’t you fight for her”. What she didn’t realize was that I had been trying for what is going on 2 1/2 years. Clearly this is not something I’m proud of, but she also needed to understand that me not seeing my daughter was hurting her (I agreed), she also explained how this will eventually lead to Daddy Issues in the future (I agreed with that statement as well). What she failed to realize was and is that my relationship with my daughter Danielle or the lack there of, was not completely up to me. My daughter’s mother didn’t plan on having a child with me and starting a family, her plan was to have another baby to include to her own personal family. Most men fail to realize this fact. Danielle’s mother already had the paperwork started and child support was indefinite. After explaining how I wanted to be able to father My only daughter without the help of the family court and child support system. I myself am a product of the family court. The truth is my situation is nothing that’s uncommon in the African-American Community. Most Black women prefer to be single mothers, although 99% will disagree.
The point of me sharing this story is just to say, every man looks like a deadbeat dad if you subscribe to the narrative that men can only be predators and women can only be victims. Most women condone the fuck shit lifestyles that single mothers want to live.
The problem, from their point of view was why aren’t you sad, torn up inside, depressed, etc? Who said I haven’t felt all those feeling? Who said I’m not still feeling that way? The problem they really had if we’re being honest was I see the situation for what it is! I don’t have the money to send to child support. Honestly, I’m just surviving out here. And as a people or community we participate in this foolishness. If the mother has full custody that’s what that is! The sooner you understand that the better off you’ll be. I’m smart enough to know that my daughter knows I love her but what I will not do is pretend I have a dog in the fight, to the courts my roll is to provide financial support that’s all. With that formula if followed to the technical T, is still less than a hat should be required so arguing with the child’s mother is expected and that’s ridiculous. So I ask the women out here I challenge you to have an open mind and try to understand that most Black men in America are barely making it, and the Polo Shirts & Jordan’s are just props so a nigga don’t look like he ain’t shit even if that’s your opinion about them anyway.
Understand That Nothing In Life Is BLK & White, it’s a 100 shades of grey.
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